faggot!

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babibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabibabi

noktah

taip septah dua noktah noktah noktah

asalnya nak menaip juga noktah noktah
tapi tak perlu kot noktah noktah

asalnya nak meluahkan juga noktah noktah
tapi tak guna kot noktah noktah

asalnya nak merasa juga noktah noktah
tapi tak kesampaian kot noktah noktah

ye kaseh tak sampai
akku dah ckp dah
akku dah tau dah

noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah
noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah noktah

terima kaseh noktah noktah

empty slot

its been a while is it..
try to get my brains activated..
*sigh*

loosing my grip..
i cant feel d touch..
lost my track..
it ridiculous!

not that i dun want to..
i juz.. *sigh*
so.. silent!!
its empty!!
its.. nothing..

..............

elin sayang mak

3 june 2009..

jam 15:(sumthing)
"kak, ko dh amek bju?"
"ha'ah la.. blh la singgah jap.. 1 jln kan.."

jam 16:17
"hello.. kak kat maner?"
"jusco.. abah dh sampai ker?"
"blm.. dlm p'jalanan.."
"owh ok.."
"kak balik umah yer.. td abah nyah call,
bgtau, mak nyah meninggal lepas asar td.."
"innalillah~~~"

handphone terlepas dari tgn..

flash back..

"jumpe mak kamu aritu, ckp ke dier
lame benor tak bejumpe ngan kome..."
*sigh*

akku kira, sudah 25 thn mak..
masih terasa belaianmu..
masih terasa setiap garis tgn mu..
masih terasa pelukan hangatmu..
masih terasa kucupan mesra mu..
masih terngiang2 ditelinga
saat kau memanggil namaku..
"elin, mkn le.."
masih terngiang2 ditelinga
saat kau tertawa kegembiraan..
masih segar diingatan ketika
kita bersama-sama menghabiskan
masa.. melepaskan rindu..
kau pgg tgnku mak..
kau urutkan pipiku mak..
kau tersenyum manis kearah ku mak..

kali terakhir kita bertemu,
akku kira itulah kali pertama
akku menciummu..
bukan tak mahu mak..
tp akku takut..
bukan takutkan mak..
tapi tkutkan tersilap langkah
terjadi sesuatu yg tak diingini..
dan ayat terakhir mak..
"wangi nye kamu elin.."
mak pun wangi jugak..
sentiase wangi..

semalam mase smpi dimuka pintu
nampak abah nyah lalu.. senyum..
tapi mate abah nyah tak pandai tipu..
"mak dah tak ade.."
semalam dalam bilik..
adek cakap..
"tahun ni tadela samperit lg.."
semalam jugak akku cakap..
"tahun ni tade la bakar lemang lg.."
*sigh*

semalam.. akku duduk hujung katil mak..
lepas tu akku rase mcm nk pegi dekat..
akku bangun akku berdiri dekat pinggang mak..
akku nak duduk, tapi akku takut..
takut mak sakit..
akku nak pegi dekat lagi ngan mak..
akku tenung muke mak samar2..
nak bukak akku takut..
tenang aje muke mak..
dah berhenti bernafas tapi, akku rasa..
akku dapat rasa rasa sayang dier..
still around.. still around..

akku menyesal tak ucap terima kaseh
akku menyesal tak menjenguk lebih kerap
akku menyesal tak ada masa dier perlukan akku
akku menyesal tak jaga dier mcm dier jaga akku
akku menyesal tak cium dier banyak2
akku menyesal tak peluk dier mcm dier peluk akku
akku menyesal tak luang masa lebih kerap

tapi..
akku tak menyesal bunda hantar umah mak..
akku tak menyesal bunda tinggalkan akku bersama mak
akku tak menyesal dijaga oleh mak
akku tak menyesal dimarah mak
akku tak menyesal dipukul mak
akku tak menyesal diberi makan mak
akku tak menyesal temani mak sepanjang malam
sebab akku sayang mak!!
sebab akku hargai semua yang mak beri pada akku..
terima kasih mak!! elin n adek2 sayang kan mak!!

mak, semoga roh mak dicucuri rahmat
ditempatkan bersama orang2 yang beriman..
amin.. amin.. amin..

tiada tajuk

akku tak minta dilahirkan ke dunia..
dengan perangaiku begini..
dengan rupaku begini..
dengan bentuk ku begini..

kau agungkan mereka..
kau puji mereka..
kau suka mereka..
kau gembira bersama mereka..
kau senang bersama mereka..
kau terhibur bersaca mereka..

disini, disampingku..
kau sedih..
kau penat..
kau letih..
kau marah..
kau berdendam..
kau kecewa..
kau benci..
kau berduka..

terima akku apa adanya akku..
kerana akku tidak diberi pilihan..
kerana akku tidak dilahirkan
dengan kesempurnaan seorang perempuan..

namun begitu..
akku tidak kesal
kerana berada bersama kamoo..
akku tidak kesal
kerana perlu hidup bersama kamoo..
akku tidak kesal
kerana akku menyayangi kamoo..

kerana kamoo tempat akku mngadu..
kerana kamoo tempat akku berlinding..
kerana kamoo tempat akku menumpang kasih..
kerana kamoo nyawaku..
kerana kamoo segalanya buat akku..






p/s : kadang2 jurang itu diisi dengan segala keperitan mendengar tentang mereka yang laen.. yang sempurna..